ABBREVIATED IRONY
I have often thought it ironic
If not positively absurd
That the term, abbreviated
Is an eleven letter word
THE EXORCIST
There is a ghost in my house
A poltergeist in nature
And I am determined to see
Its imminent departure
I have secured the services
Of an expert of eminence
An exorcist of renown
To un-haunt my residence
He is not a cheap solution
To my poltergeist problem
But the spirit has to go
Before I end up in an asylum
But the price must be met
This was sternly stressed
For if I default on the fee
The house will be repossessed
THE ABSENT MINDED OCTOGENARIAN
An octogenarian visited his doctor
'I think I'm getting senile” he said
The doctor replied “I don’t think you are senile
Let’s look for a different diagnosis instead”
“But I keep forgetting to do up my fly”
The old man said “After I’ve been for a pee”
The doctor smiled and then replied
“Not opening your fly before you start, that’s senility”
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