ARE YOU WEARING ELFISH EARS?

 

Are you wearing elfish ears?

It’s a very interesting feature

Though more appropriate

On a woodland creature

And not really suitable

For one in your position

You are let me remind you

The leader of the opposition

PLASTIC CHRISTMAS

 

Now Dasher, Now, Dancer

Now Prancer and Vixen

On Comet, On Cupid

On Donner, On Blitzen

So the plastic Santa’s say

Down at the mall

But shoppers have a verse

That serves one and all

Now charge it, now defer it

No cash and No cheques

On store card, on visa

On MasterCard and A-mex

DECEMBER REMEMBRANCES

 

Every year during the festivities

I remember friends and family

Those who are no longer with us

To celebrate another Christmas

And with each passing December

It seems there are more to remember

But I take time in equal measure

To enjoy each moment and to treasure

Those special ones who are still here

Whose number also grows year on year

A MOTHERS CHRISTMAS TALE

 

I have worked for Ebenezer Scrooge all year

A man devoid of any sign of Christmas cheer

I’ve avoided being kissed by the office Romeo

By navigating the office avoiding mistletoe

As the time is ticking towards Christmas day

I could have done with a little help along the way

I’ve dealt with shoppers impatient and rude

But I tried to stay cheerful while I queued

I’ve bought all the presents the paper and bows

I’ve put up with all the countless ho ho ho’s

I’ve got all the groceries and gallons of booze

While you sat in front of the telly and snoozed

I’ve decked the halls I’ve trimmed the tree

I’ve wrapped all the presents from you and me

I’ve written all the Christmas cards to everyone

Which I hand delivered though I posted some

I’ve cleaned the whole house from bottom to top

I’ve washed and ironed till I’m ready to drop

I’ve prepared the veg, I’ve stuffed the bird

I’ve hung the stockings and you’ve not stirred

And the very second I take a minute for me

The first thing I hear is “Mum, what’s for tea”

So to Santa Claus I make my annual plea

For a very special present just for me

Just one year I would like to escape this stress

So that I too can have a merry Christmas

THIS CHRISTMAS TIME

 

This Christmas Time

When you celebrate the day

With friends and family

Good spirits on display

When your dining table

Is full to overflowing

Everyone cosily warm

With the firelight glowing

And you sit in your armchair

With your waist band straining

Opening all the presents

When outside its cold or raining

When you have over indulged

To the point of gluttony

Take a moment to think

About the all too many

Spare a thought for the needy

For the tired and the weary

Or those who are just lonely

The cold and the hungry

The numerous homeless

The defenseless and the helpless

Enjoy this Christmas Time a lot

But think of those who cannot

YES THERE IS A SANTA CLAUS

 

If you want the great gift giver

To come on his sleigh and deliver

Then remember this simple rhyme

And recall it at Christmas time

“If in Santa you do not believe

Christmas gifts you will not receive”

WHO’S THE NEW GUY?

 

A tenth reindeer flew in Santa’s team

One unknown pulling Santa’s sleigh

We know the names of nine of them

Including Rudolf leading the way

So who was the mystery number ten?

Twas Rudolf the brown nosed reindeer

Flew behind his red nosed brother

But he couldn’t stop as quick I fear