HAPPY STRESSLESS

 

A good friend of mine

Does his Christmas shopping

In less than two hours

With decs for party popping

And Gifts for twenty-five

Friends and family

All on Christmas Eve

Including a six-foot tree

IT’S CHRISTMAS

 

People have been discovering

On a Christmas Morning

That the curse of Christmas

That’s causing the most fuss

Has been unanimously concluded

To be “Batteries not included”

KIDS DON’T UNDERSTAND CHRISTMAS

 

All children think

Christmas just happens

But parents work tirelessly

To bring it about

Months in the planning

Putting things away

Things to add to a special day

Shopping and wrapping

Dressing and decking

Supermarket shopping

The prices heart stopping

Journeying from shop to shop

For the latest must have toy

All made worth while

To see a face lit with joy

CHRISTMAS SHOCKING

 

Well worn festive tunes

Blare out

Hapless faces

Stare out

Faces strained

Bemused, Confused

Lists gripped tight

Pens ticking or deleting

Then onward

Loaded trolleys

Wildly steering

Zig zagging

Aisle to aisle

Every item

Must be had

Gin for her

Beer for dad

Chocs and cakes

Chops and steaks

Turkey, stuffing

Nuts and fruit

Frozen this

Prepacked that

Pop and juice

Something’s loose

Everything ticked

On the tight gripped list

Nothing missed

Merry Christmas wished

Hundreds of pounds

Of Christmas bought

The festivities can begin

Relax in the knowledge

The shops will only be shut

For twenty-four hours

CHRISTMAS RULES

 

Our Christmas fare

Tables heaving

Cupboards overflowing

Contrasts starkly

With our foreign brothers

With meager bowls

Of meal or rice

How would they react?

To our gluttony

 

The homeless survive

On handouts

Of soup and bread

Or half eaten burgers

Discarded in bins

Sleeping in doorways

Or In cardboard boxes

With news paper bedding

 

Should we feel guilt?

For having more than they

For our good fortune

No we shouldn’t

But we should not forget them

We should spare a thought

For the less fortunate

And be charitable

A kind word or deed

Celebrate Christmas

By Christ’s rules

CHRISTMAS SHOPPING

 

It was Christmas Eve closing time, nearly

Where a last-minute shopper, frustrated clearly

Was rummaging through the freezer cabinet

At her nearest out of town supermarket

Desperately searching for a frozen turkey

And couldn't find one big enough for her family

Then she saw a young shop assistant pass by

And decided that she would give him a try

"Do these turkeys get any bigger?" she said

Puzzled he replied, "No madam, they're dead."

THE SANTA CLAUSE

When I was a child

I believed in Santa Claus

When I got older

I didn’t believe in Santa Claus

When I became a parent

I was Santa Claus

Now I have grandchildren

I look like Santa Claus