FAIRY TALE STATISTIC

 

Here’s a Statistic

That’s really crappy

6 out of 7 dwarves

Really aren’t Happy

YOU ARE A NAUGHTY LITTLE ELF

 

You are a naughty little Elf

Do you behave yourself?

By the look upon your face

You’re no stranger to disgrace

So it is my Christmas wish

To share a Christmas kiss

So climb upon me knee

And you will quickly see

I have that special touch

That you’ll like very much

When I curl your toes

Inside your ho ho hose

THE PIPES OF CHRISTMAS PAST BLOW OUT

 

The pipes of Christmas past blow out

The melodies of yesteryear

With memories to warm the heart

And bring a sentimental tear

A DOG ISN’T JUST FOR CHRISTMAS

 

A dog isn’t just for Christmas

That’s what they say

And they are correct

It’s also nice cold on Boxing Day

TRANSVESTITE CHRISTMAS

 

Do you think that cross dressers

Find Christmas is merry?

I bet you think they are sad

Well on the contrary

I really love Christmas

As I can eat, drink and be Mary

MY GOOSE WAS COOKED

 

On Christmas morning

Into the kitchen I snook      

And as my wife cooked the Goose

I goosed the cook

NOVELTY TREE CHOCOLATES

 

When we were kids,

Before we went to bed,

My brothers and me

Were allowed a pick

A novelty chocolate

Off the Christmas tree