72 Miles From The Sea

  I trapped a couple of Vegan burglars In my basement to my total disbelief At least I assumed they were Vegan Because they keep shout...

  The most effective way, Which might sound quirky, To give up veganism Is quite simply, Cold Turkey

  I just had a vegan pastie , Which wasn’t bad at all, It wasn’t Cornish though, It was made in Quornwall

  I ate a vegan sausage roll And was pleasantly surprised Considering they don’t eat meat Vegans are very tasty guys

  My last girlfriend treated me Like a piece of meat That’s because she was a Vegan And refused to touch me

  If I discovered a new species, An animal to suit the agrarians I would have to name it Quorn To really mess with vegetarians

  For my birthday my kids Bought me a Tofu Gateaux Which was as much use to me As a slinky in a bungalow

  My son has announced His intent to take the pledge To give up eating meat He has given to allege But I don’t know what he’ll eat ...

  Have you ever eaten vegetarian? Have you done that; do you reckon? Well, no I haven’t, but I’d like to Tell me do they taste like ch...

  Have you ever eaten vegetarian? Is that something you have done? Well, no I haven’t, but I’d like to Though I couldn’t eat a whole o...

  In the seventies Seeds and stems Were for chilling out Now I’m in my seventies Seeds and stems Are roughage

  If the Star Wars series Was only just written Luke would be a vegan Flying the Millennial Falcon

  My last girlfriend treated me Like a piece of meat That’s because she was a Vegan And refused to touch me

There is knowledge I need to know Which will put me in the box seat Such as, if vegetarians eat vegetables, What on earth do humanitar...

  I just had a vegan pastie , Which wasn’t bad at all, It wasn’t Cornish though, It was made in Quornwall

  I am a vegetarian But not because I love animals I am a vegetarian Simply because I hate vegetables

  I ate a vegan sausage roll And was pleasantly surprised Considering they don’t eat meat Vegans are very tasty guys