72 Miles From The Sea

  Finally, my tired mind was at peace And my eyes closed, and I was able to dream But after falling asleep it seemed Like minutes, bef...

  Early to bed, early to rise Makes a man healthy wealthy and wise Early to rise, late to bed Makes a man haggard fatigued and dead

  Sleep is my most favourite thing From lights out to days dawning In fact it would be true to say It's the why I get up in the mo...

  Last night I was shaken violently awake So I thought it must be an earthquake But I soon realised as my heart was soaring It was jus...

Sister Agatha at the convent Was somnambulistic The sleep walking nun Was called a Roaming Catholic  

  On my bed at home I have A deluxe memory foam mattress But it remembers I’m overweight Which causes me great distress

  On my bed at home I have A deluxe memory foam mattress But it remembers I’m over sixty Which causes me great distress

  I have a memory foam mattress And I awake feeling brighter I just wish it would remember me When I was Three stone lighter

  There is a limit to how early You might go to your repose Or you might end up retiring Before you actually arose

  I lay in bed quite restless In a measure of distress Uncomfortable in my nightdress And I started to obsess   Why was the sun an...

  Dreams are an odd part of life Last night my considerate wife Woke me from my slumber to declare “It was so bloody unfair” I said ...

  Dreams are really very odd Last night my wife sat up and said “Tell Lionel to stop It’s really hurting my head” I enquired politel...

  My wife is mad Last night she snored so loud That she woke herself up Then she hit me For snoring so bloody loud That I woke her...

  My wife is mad Last night she snored so loud That she woke herself up Then she hit me For snoring so bloody loud That I woke her...

  I lie awake in the wee small hours Unable to just drift away My mind is constantly replaying All the events of the day I’ve tossed...

  I want to inhabit forever That special place that dreams fill That safe and cosy place Beneath the duvet in Snooze Ville   Betwe...

  I have some information to impart Why it is that men snore When they lie on their backs Is the time they do it more It’s a simple ...

  I plugged my electric blanket into the toaster Not deliberately, I knew that wouldn’t be right It really happened by mistake, but it h...

  I plugged my electric blanket into the toaster Not deliberately, I knew that wouldn’t be right It really happened by mistake, but it h...

  Finally, my tired mind was at peace And my eyes closed, and I was able to dream But after falling asleep it seemed Like minutes, bef...