72 Miles From The Sea

  Henry the Eight desiccated his dead wife Though she had always been a paragon, Then she was finely chopped and put in a jar And that...

  Writer Charles Dickens Kept in his kitchen The best of thymes, The worst of thymes

  An accident in the kitchen When the condiments ignited Blew mixed herbs in my eyes And left me Parsley-sighted

  When the allspice singers Really went off the rails Coryanda and star Anise Had the Pepperatzi on their tails

  There is a particular herb That by reason and rhyme Is most injurious to a lady's Beauty and that is Thyme

  My gardener has OCD His herb beds are alphabetized I asked how he found the time “It’s next to the Sage” he replied