72 Miles From The Sea

  Two Clowns divorced And it was a very messy to do As they all stood and watched The Custardy battle ensue

  My wife has left me And taken the children All our friends Have abandoned me And taken her side Then when I put on The Televis...

  Why did the divorcee cross the road? Well not just to get to the other side The reason he wanted to cross over Was so he could avoid...

  My wife and I are separated And the reason why we parted She started all conversations After the programs had started

  Half of all marriages Will end in divorce Which just leaves the Unhappy ones of course

  After ten years of marriage I am divorced by choice Regrettably I have to say That it wasn’t my choice

  The divorce Court Judge said “Mr. Curtis, I have decided to give your wife £500 a week” “That’s very fair, your honour,' Mr Curtis...

Electronic banking Is the way it is done Lightning fast transfers At the touch of a button   Though not necessarily The fastest ...

  Sleeping separate nights Living separate days We live separate lives Let’s go our separate ways

  Divorce is… Cathartic, purification Therapeutically purgative Like colonic irrigation

  When I used to leave the house I kissed my wife goodbye Now as I leave my wife I have kissed the house goodbye

  A woman is like a hurricane Whether your partner or your spouse When she comes she’s hot and wet When she leaves she takes half the ...

  When first we met, I thought of her She who must be an angel When we were married, she became She who must be obeyed Now we are di...

In my long life I have found this to be true Ex-husbands are like thrush They keep coming back to you  

  Two Clowns divorced And it was a very messy to do As they all stood and watched The Custardy battle ensue

  Two Clowns divorced And it was a very messy to do As they all stood and watched The Custardy battle ensue

  Divorce is… Cathartic, purification Therapeutically purgative Like colonic irrigation

  In Norwich at my local pub, I sat After a pint and a couple of gins And contemplated relationships With my muckers for their sins ...

My wife told me if I go fishing Just one more time, today Then she's going to leave me I'm going to miss her in a way

  Love is grand and that’s the truth But divorce is fifty grand - struth