72 Miles From The Sea

  It happens every Halloween when Enthusiastic revellers frequent Accident and Emergency, where Clinicians call it trick or treatment

  I don’t believe in spooks and demons I think that should be understood But there are always more trick-or-treaters Than there are ki...

  Halloween is one of the very few Acceptable times to wear body glitter When you have a reasonable expectation Of not being mistaken ...

  My future wife was dressed like a tart When we first met on Elm Street And she said very provocatively “I'll be your trick if yo...

  Thank goodness for Halloween, I can say that without hesitation Because the cobwebs have suddenly Become Halloween decorations

I met a girl on Halloween, Wearing blood suckers attire But alas she wasn’t costumed She was actually a vampire

  If vampires can’t see Their own reflection In a mirror, either flat Convex or concave Then the thing that I Have always wondered...

  We found a brilliant builder His workmanship is out of sight The only snag is he’s Transylvanian So, he can only work at night

  Are you wearing Halloween slippers? They look very cute it must be said But I think they’d look much cuter If I was to see them unde...

  Halloween is just an excuse For girls to dress inappropriately And that’s why Halloween Is the best holiday for me

  My friend asked me What I was going to be For Halloween I said “Drunk will do me”

  If vampires can’t see Their own reflection In a mirror or anything else That’s shiny Then the thing I Have always wondered is ...

  I am being haunted by A dancing ghostly vision Who really has the moves So I call him Boogie Man

    Why couldn't the witch have children? It wasn’t just because she was a meanie The answer is far more fundamental Because her...

The Grim Reaper came for me last night And I could barely catch my breath But I beat him away with a vacuum cleaner And was really Dyson ...

  We found a brilliant builder His workmanship is out of sight The only snag is he’s Transylvanian So he can only work at night

Are you wearing bloody clothes? I don’t mind admitting that you look scary I hope it’s a Halloween costume and you Haven’t escaped fro...

  I pretend to be someone I’m not Just to receive something sweet Which could be for Valentine’s Day Or just for a Halloween treat

  The lesson that Halloween teaches Us all, Might well strike a chord It’s pretending to be something you're not Which will lead t...

  I wonder if Halloween is the only Day of the year that the goths Dress colourfully like butterflies Instead of the normal drab moths