In Cumalot, Big King Dick
Really lived up to his name
In his kingdom he’d shagged
Every damsel and dame
Then one summer morning
With not a cloud in the skies
A terrible thing happened
King Dick failed to rise
His Royal Prince was limp
Rung out and pathetically flaccid
His mojo had deserted him
King Dicks libido was dead
He called the court physician
Who prepared him an elixir
He called the court sorcerer
Who prepared him a philtre
But when cure-all and love potion
Failed to raise the dead
They tried erotic love balms
And sexual salves instead
But when these proved nostrum
Failing to raise the dead
The King lost his temper
Ordering the removal of their heads
He sent for the Royal love-smiths
The most alluring in the land
The dangerously seductive,
Sultry temptresses took him in hand
When the Royal Dick was still limp
They tried something else
Kissing every erogenous point
But this failed to quicken his pulse
So after he’d exhausted his supply
Of all his tarts and bints
He called for the Royal carpenter
To fashion him a splint
But this was no real solution
And it merely made him wince
Especially when he got a splinter
In his flaccid little Prince
He looked at dirty pictures
And he read erotic literature
He watched his soldiers shagging
He was so desperate for a cure
So when every thing had failed him
He took to his bed in disgust
Wouldn’t speak to his courtiers
He just reminisced of his lust
Then one day sickness was abroad
And he waited for breakfast in bed
Instead of his hot little maid
A mangy old crone came instead
He looked at the warty face crone
Moving about to and fro
And King Dick felt the stirrings
Of the Royal Prince down below
He leapt out of bed and grabbed her
And quickly removed his nightgown
Then he bent the crone over a chair
And the little Prince was crowned
From that day on in the kingdom
No crone was safe from his lust
Dirty ugly and warty faced
The Kings little Prince wasn’t fussed
Wednesday, 21 April 2010
THE PRIAPIC YOUTH
The priapic youth
Has a sexual obsession
He thinks about sex so much
He has a permanent erection
Even when it stands at ease
He will still have a semi on
And he will produce semen
Sufficient to fill a demijohn
Every thing in his life
Will turn on the priapic youth
To such an extent he is
Preoccupied with self abuse
A glimpse of a girl’s neck
Is enough to get him randy
Then it’s out with the old chap
For a quick hand shandy
He’ll wake with “an early riser”
Each and every morn
So he starts the day with a tug
On his “dawn horn”
He’ll pull the pud after breakfast
Beat his meat before brunch
He’ll knock one out at elevensies
And spank the monkey at lunch
After tea he chokes the chicken
In the shower he has a glop
Watching telly a knuckle shuffle
And in bed he’ll bash the bishop
Such is a day in the life
Of a priapic youth and his issues
Who masturbates to excess
And gets through a lot of tissues
Has a sexual obsession
He thinks about sex so much
He has a permanent erection
Even when it stands at ease
He will still have a semi on
And he will produce semen
Sufficient to fill a demijohn
Every thing in his life
Will turn on the priapic youth
To such an extent he is
Preoccupied with self abuse
A glimpse of a girl’s neck
Is enough to get him randy
Then it’s out with the old chap
For a quick hand shandy
He’ll wake with “an early riser”
Each and every morn
So he starts the day with a tug
On his “dawn horn”
He’ll pull the pud after breakfast
Beat his meat before brunch
He’ll knock one out at elevensies
And spank the monkey at lunch
After tea he chokes the chicken
In the shower he has a glop
Watching telly a knuckle shuffle
And in bed he’ll bash the bishop
Such is a day in the life
Of a priapic youth and his issues
Who masturbates to excess
And gets through a lot of tissues
FAITH
FAITH IS LIKE # 1
Faith is like electricity
You can’t see its traits
But you can see the light
That it generates
FAITH IS LIKE # 2
Faith is like electricity
You can’t see it
But you can see the light
That emanates from it
JESUS
He travels the four winds
He is everywhere.He is an ever present force
He is the one who cares
He is our strength
He is with us from the start
He gives us joy
He lives in our hearts
He is our hope
His heart is full of love
He repairs us
He is love
Jesus is the King of Kings
Who died for us
On that cross of pain
To cleanse us
THANK YOU LORD FOR BEING THERE
Thank you Lord for being there
And bathing us in your blessed care
Thank you for all your blessings
And understanding my transgressing
Thank you for being the one
Who watches over my three sons
And my most wonderful wife
Thank you for being in my life
YESHUA (JESUS)
Yeshua, you are
Our hope of salvation
Dying for us
Our hope of glory
Living in us
Yeshua, you are
Our hope for the future
Living for you
Our hope for redemption
Alive in you
THE LOVE OF CHRIST
The love of Christ
Unconditional, pure
Deeply felt love
That doth endure
Faith is like electricity
You can’t see its traits
But you can see the light
That it generates
FAITH IS LIKE # 2
Faith is like electricity
You can’t see it
But you can see the light
That emanates from it
JESUS
He travels the four winds
He is everywhere.He is an ever present force
He is the one who cares
He is our strength
He is with us from the start
He gives us joy
He lives in our hearts
He is our hope
His heart is full of love
He repairs us
He is love
Jesus is the King of Kings
Who died for us
On that cross of pain
To cleanse us
THANK YOU LORD FOR BEING THERE
Thank you Lord for being there
And bathing us in your blessed care
Thank you for all your blessings
And understanding my transgressing
Thank you for being the one
Who watches over my three sons
And my most wonderful wife
Thank you for being in my life
YESHUA (JESUS)
Yeshua, you are
Our hope of salvation
Dying for us
Our hope of glory
Living in us
Yeshua, you are
Our hope for the future
Living for you
Our hope for redemption
Alive in you
THE LOVE OF CHRIST
The love of Christ
Unconditional, pure
Deeply felt love
That doth endure
THE BEAUTIFUL GAME
GO FOURTH
Who will finish fourth?
Will it be Liverpool?
Who stake their claim?
Or will Aston Villa rule
Who will stand tall?
Will it be Man City?
That win the prize
Or will Spurs be sitting pretty
Who will go forth?
Into the Champions League
To dine at the top table
Who of these wannabes
Liverpool were last the champions
More than 20 years ago
Aston villa weren’t crowned
For 30 years or so
Its more than 40 years
Since Man City won
And Spurs were last the winners
In 1961
But the Champion’s League beckons
For these wannabes
These trophy less also ran’s
How can that be?
ALL IN THE GAME
Shaven headed barbarians
And tattooed savages
Strut with preening peacocks
In performing their pantomime
While their vengeful tribes
With banners held high
Chant their rhythmic cacophony
Faces distorted with hate
On the field of honour
They grapple and kick
They push and pull
They dive and roll
Assault and assail
Connive and cheat
In unforgiving onslaughts
They perform for baying hordes
A vile and brutal spectacle
Always referred to
As the beautiful game
MUMMY’S BOYS
I long since came to terms
Since John Barnes set the trend
With footballers wearing gloves
To keep their little pandies warm
I am less understanding
Of players taking to the field
With tights beneath their shorts
But it seems I must accept it
But the line has to be drawn somewhere
And that line was crossed
This very weekend
I was shocked beyond belief
To see a player take to the field of play
Wearing a muffler about his neck
FOOTBALL
There are many differences
Between Rugby and football
Rules, number of players, ball shape
Goal posts, pitch markings, duration
And so on and so forth
It was once said that football
Is a gentleman’s game played by ruffians
And Rugby a ruffians game played by gentleman
Not quite as true as it used to be
But still not far off the mark
I’ve even heard it said
That Football is played by children
And Rugby by grownups
But for me the difference
Can best be defined in this way
A Footballer spends 90 minutes
Pretending to be injured
While a Rugby player spends 80 minutes
Pretending that he is not
BLATTER’S FOLLY
Everyone wants a video ref in the game
There are no dissenting voices I can name
Fans shout their support and managers want it
Players are in favour and even the refs want it
Because it is a change that really matters
Everybody want its except Mr Blatter
UEFA CHAMPIONS GREED
I hate the Champion’s League
On so many levels
I hate it because it’s a competition
Devised by money grubbing devils
I hate it because you have to enter it
Because that is where the money is found
Money to lure the pampered prima donnas
To your particular ground
I hate it because it is ceded
So the best teams are always on view
So that UEFA can optimise
Their television revenue
I hate it because it doesn’t seem to know
What it really wants to be
Is it a knock out competition?
Or the beginnings of the super league
But I hate it most of all
Above all other considerations
Because the European Champions League
Has so few actual champions
Post Script
Well all the above is true
But I regret the overriding reason
That I hate it so passionately is that
We have been knocked out this season
THE NATURAL
As a footballer I must confess
My skills locker is somewhat bereft
I am a naturally two footed player
But unfortunately both of them are left
Who will finish fourth?
Will it be Liverpool?
Who stake their claim?
Or will Aston Villa rule
Who will stand tall?
Will it be Man City?
That win the prize
Or will Spurs be sitting pretty
Who will go forth?
Into the Champions League
To dine at the top table
Who of these wannabes
Liverpool were last the champions
More than 20 years ago
Aston villa weren’t crowned
For 30 years or so
Its more than 40 years
Since Man City won
And Spurs were last the winners
In 1961
But the Champion’s League beckons
For these wannabes
These trophy less also ran’s
How can that be?
ALL IN THE GAME
Shaven headed barbarians
And tattooed savages
Strut with preening peacocks
In performing their pantomime
While their vengeful tribes
With banners held high
Chant their rhythmic cacophony
Faces distorted with hate
On the field of honour
They grapple and kick
They push and pull
They dive and roll
Assault and assail
Connive and cheat
In unforgiving onslaughts
They perform for baying hordes
A vile and brutal spectacle
Always referred to
As the beautiful game
MUMMY’S BOYS
I long since came to terms
Since John Barnes set the trend
With footballers wearing gloves
To keep their little pandies warm
I am less understanding
Of players taking to the field
With tights beneath their shorts
But it seems I must accept it
But the line has to be drawn somewhere
And that line was crossed
This very weekend
I was shocked beyond belief
To see a player take to the field of play
Wearing a muffler about his neck
FOOTBALL
There are many differences
Between Rugby and football
Rules, number of players, ball shape
Goal posts, pitch markings, duration
And so on and so forth
It was once said that football
Is a gentleman’s game played by ruffians
And Rugby a ruffians game played by gentleman
Not quite as true as it used to be
But still not far off the mark
I’ve even heard it said
That Football is played by children
And Rugby by grownups
But for me the difference
Can best be defined in this way
A Footballer spends 90 minutes
Pretending to be injured
While a Rugby player spends 80 minutes
Pretending that he is not
BLATTER’S FOLLY
Everyone wants a video ref in the game
There are no dissenting voices I can name
Fans shout their support and managers want it
Players are in favour and even the refs want it
Because it is a change that really matters
Everybody want its except Mr Blatter
UEFA CHAMPIONS GREED
I hate the Champion’s League
On so many levels
I hate it because it’s a competition
Devised by money grubbing devils
I hate it because you have to enter it
Because that is where the money is found
Money to lure the pampered prima donnas
To your particular ground
I hate it because it is ceded
So the best teams are always on view
So that UEFA can optimise
Their television revenue
I hate it because it doesn’t seem to know
What it really wants to be
Is it a knock out competition?
Or the beginnings of the super league
But I hate it most of all
Above all other considerations
Because the European Champions League
Has so few actual champions
Post Script
Well all the above is true
But I regret the overriding reason
That I hate it so passionately is that
We have been knocked out this season
THE NATURAL
As a footballer I must confess
My skills locker is somewhat bereft
I am a naturally two footed player
But unfortunately both of them are left
SPRINGTIME
SPRING
As spring comes around again
With its abundant falling rain
The rolling hills of luscious green
Are most pleasing to be seen
And with the renewal of spring
The heart lifts as if taking wing
When Daffodils break through
And spring flowers of every hue
Is their a better time on earth
To feel wealth of natures worth
REFRESHING SPRING
Refreshing spring
The season of renewal
When nature will release
Her early jewels
THE HIGH MELT
The high melt waters rush
Feeding springs annual event
As over the ancient rock
Water tumbles effervescent
As it heads inexorably to the sea
In its headlong descent
THE HILLSIDES IN MAY
No finer sight the eye will see
Than the hillsides in May
A carpet of green spread out
So as to take your breath away
THE THROWS OF SPRING
Its spring time
When beauty is released
Like a hand stitched
Patchwork masterpiece
Nature shows off
Her spring time finery
Spread like a throw
Over all you see
As spring comes around again
With its abundant falling rain
The rolling hills of luscious green
Are most pleasing to be seen
And with the renewal of spring
The heart lifts as if taking wing
When Daffodils break through
And spring flowers of every hue
Is their a better time on earth
To feel wealth of natures worth
REFRESHING SPRING
Refreshing spring
The season of renewal
When nature will release
Her early jewels
THE HIGH MELT
The high melt waters rush
Feeding springs annual event
As over the ancient rock
Water tumbles effervescent
As it heads inexorably to the sea
In its headlong descent
THE HILLSIDES IN MAY
No finer sight the eye will see
Than the hillsides in May
A carpet of green spread out
So as to take your breath away
THE THROWS OF SPRING
Its spring time
When beauty is released
Like a hand stitched
Patchwork masterpiece
Nature shows off
Her spring time finery
Spread like a throw
Over all you see
PUT DOWN's
PUT DOWN # 31
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension
Before he has chance to deliver
His pick up line to you
Just say to him
"And which dwarf are you?"
PUT DOWN # 32
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension
Before he has chance to deliver
His pick up line, get in quick
And say "I see you've chosen today
To humiliate yourself in public"
PUT DOWN # 33
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension
When he sidles up to you with his pick up line
Which will be dumb like as not
Just say to him first
“Hi I know a village that’s looking for and idiot”
PUT DOWN # 34
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension“
If you want a good time” he might say
“Then I’m your man”
Just reply to him "Really?
Then I might as well become a lesbian"
PUT DOWN # 35
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension“
If your looking for loving” he might say
“Then I’m definitely your man”
Just reply to him “Sorry, but after meeting you
I'm thinking of becoming a lesbian"
PUT DOWN # 36
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension
Sometimes you may have to deflect
The same offender so you can then say
“My God! How many times do I have to flush
Before you’ll finally go away”?
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension
Before he has chance to deliver
His pick up line to you
Just say to him
"And which dwarf are you?"
PUT DOWN # 32
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension
Before he has chance to deliver
His pick up line, get in quick
And say "I see you've chosen today
To humiliate yourself in public"
PUT DOWN # 33
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension
When he sidles up to you with his pick up line
Which will be dumb like as not
Just say to him first
“Hi I know a village that’s looking for and idiot”
PUT DOWN # 34
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension“
If you want a good time” he might say
“Then I’m your man”
Just reply to him "Really?
Then I might as well become a lesbian"
PUT DOWN # 35
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension“
If your looking for loving” he might say
“Then I’m definitely your man”
Just reply to him “Sorry, but after meeting you
I'm thinking of becoming a lesbian"
PUT DOWN # 36
Put downs work the best
For deflecting unwanted attention
But try to be amusing
As this relieves the tension
Sometimes you may have to deflect
The same offender so you can then say
“My God! How many times do I have to flush
Before you’ll finally go away”?
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – CALLIOPE (MUSE OF EPIC POETRY)
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – CALLIOPE (MUSE OF EPIC POETRY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The first was,
The divine Calliope,
Beautiful-voiced,
Was the muse of the epic poets
A writing tablet in her hand
Calliope was Homer's muse
Inspiration for the Iliad
Divine influence of the Odyssey
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – CLIO (MUSE OF HISTORY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The second was,
The divine Clio
The maker of fame,
Was the muse of history
A parchment scroll in her hands
Clio was the proclaimer
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – ERATO (MUSE OF EROTIC POETRY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The third was,
The divine Erato,
Desired and lovely,
Was the muse of the lyric poets
A golden arrow in her hand
Muse of love verse
And of Erotic poetry
Erato the muse who charms the sight
And inspires love in everybody
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – EUTERPE (MUSE OF LYRICAL POETRY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The fourth was,
The divine Euterpe,
Rejoicing well,
Was firstly the muse of music
Then of Lyrical poetry
A double flute in her hand
Euterpe the Giver of delight
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – MELPOMÈNE (MUSE OF TRAGEDY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The fifth was,
The divine Melpomène,
The one that is melodious,
Was firstly the muse of singing
To celebrate with dance and song
Then she became the muse of tragedy
And hid behind a tragic mask
A knife or club in her hand
Creator of beautiful lyrical phrases
Melpomène muse of Horace
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – POLYHYMNIA (MUSE OF HYMNS)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The sixth was,
The divine Polyhymnia,
The one of many hymns,
Was the Muse of sacred poetry and sacred hymns
Of eloquence and pantomime
In her long cloak and classical pose
Polyhymnia was a serious, pensive and meditative muse
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – TERPSICHORE (MUSE OF DANCING)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The seventh was,
The divine Terpsichore,
Delight of dancing,
Muse of choral songs and dance
A lyre in her hand
Accompanies the dancers
Terpsichore muse of dance
Mother of the sirens
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – THALIA (MUSE OF COMEDY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The eighth was,
The divine Thalia,
Flourishing, in bloom,
Was the muse of comedy and idyllic poetry
A comic mask in her hand
The praises of Thalia, rustic goddess
And in her songs flourish through time
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – URANIA (MUSE OF ASTRONOMY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The ninth and final was,
The divine Urania,
Heavenly muse,
Was the muse of astrology
A globe in her hand
Dressed in a cloak embroidered with stars
Urania was reader of the stars
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The first was,
The divine Calliope,
Beautiful-voiced,
Was the muse of the epic poets
A writing tablet in her hand
Calliope was Homer's muse
Inspiration for the Iliad
Divine influence of the Odyssey
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – CLIO (MUSE OF HISTORY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The second was,
The divine Clio
The maker of fame,
Was the muse of history
A parchment scroll in her hands
Clio was the proclaimer
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – ERATO (MUSE OF EROTIC POETRY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The third was,
The divine Erato,
Desired and lovely,
Was the muse of the lyric poets
A golden arrow in her hand
Muse of love verse
And of Erotic poetry
Erato the muse who charms the sight
And inspires love in everybody
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – EUTERPE (MUSE OF LYRICAL POETRY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The fourth was,
The divine Euterpe,
Rejoicing well,
Was firstly the muse of music
Then of Lyrical poetry
A double flute in her hand
Euterpe the Giver of delight
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – MELPOMÈNE (MUSE OF TRAGEDY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The fifth was,
The divine Melpomène,
The one that is melodious,
Was firstly the muse of singing
To celebrate with dance and song
Then she became the muse of tragedy
And hid behind a tragic mask
A knife or club in her hand
Creator of beautiful lyrical phrases
Melpomène muse of Horace
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – POLYHYMNIA (MUSE OF HYMNS)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The sixth was,
The divine Polyhymnia,
The one of many hymns,
Was the Muse of sacred poetry and sacred hymns
Of eloquence and pantomime
In her long cloak and classical pose
Polyhymnia was a serious, pensive and meditative muse
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – TERPSICHORE (MUSE OF DANCING)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The seventh was,
The divine Terpsichore,
Delight of dancing,
Muse of choral songs and dance
A lyre in her hand
Accompanies the dancers
Terpsichore muse of dance
Mother of the sirens
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – THALIA (MUSE OF COMEDY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The eighth was,
The divine Thalia,
Flourishing, in bloom,
Was the muse of comedy and idyllic poetry
A comic mask in her hand
The praises of Thalia, rustic goddess
And in her songs flourish through time
THE NINE MUSES OF THE ARTS – URANIA (MUSE OF ASTRONOMY)
The nine muses
Daughters of Zeus
Inspiring of mortals
And nurturers of the arts
The ninth and final was,
The divine Urania,
Heavenly muse,
Was the muse of astrology
A globe in her hand
Dressed in a cloak embroidered with stars
Urania was reader of the stars
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 121
Mary had a little drink
And got pissed as a cricket
She was found in the woods
Showing the boys her thicket
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 122
Mary loved her little lamb
Every single day of course
But most of all on Sunday
With homemade mint sauce
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 123
When I was a bachelor I lived by myself,
but people told me not to get left on the shelf
So I made up my mind and got me a wife
Too late I realised I had surrendered my life
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 124
Cock a doodle doo,
My wife has lost her shoe;
oh what a convenient confidence trick
Just so she can buy some new
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 125
Little Bobby Snooks was fond of his books,
And loved by his mother and father;
But the kind of books, read by Bobby Snooks,
were pornographic in nature
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 126
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
He must be a Liberal Democrat
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 127
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
But Humpty Dumpty couldn’t fall
Because he had to wear a safety harness
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 128
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
But so Humpty Dumpty wouldn’t fall
He was sent by the head of human resource
On a three week health and safety course
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 129
Ring-a-Ring o'Rosies
Something to wipe noses"
A-tishue? A-tishue?"
Or if not a hankie
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 130
Remember, remember the fifth of November
Gunpowder, treason and plot.
They had the right approach back then
Blow up the bloody lot
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 131
Oh, Pillykin, Willykin, Winky Wee!
How does the President take his tea?
He takes it with sugar, he takes it with milk,
He takes it in bed wearing pyjamas of silk
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 132
If all the seas were one sea,
What a great sea that would be!
But if all the seas were one sea,
There’d be nowhere for you and me
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 133
I love little pussy,
Now don’t get excited
It’s not that kind of rhyme
That I want to be recited
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 134
Come let's to bed, says Sleepy-head;
Wait a while, says Mo;
Take a blue pill and grab the KY
And we’ll tup before we go.
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 135
Corporal TimWas dressed so trim,
He thought them all afraid of him;
But sad to say,The very first day,
We had a fight,He died alright,
For lack of equipment, poor Corporal Tim
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 136
Christmas is coming, the geese are getting fat
I can’t wait till Christmas to eat some of that
Coz I’m on the Atkins diet and that’s a fact
I just hope that I don’t have a heart attack
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 138
Sing a song of Sixth Sense
Haley Joel Osment wonders why
He’s followed every where
By that Bruce Willis guy
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 137
Jack and Jill went up the hill
With there supply of bottled water
What is it with these bloody ramblers?
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 139
Polly put the kettle on,
Polly put the kettle on,
Polly put the kettle on,
We'll all have tea.
Sukey take it off again,
Sukey take it off again,
Sukey take it off again,
Stop pissing about Sukey
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 140
Ring-a-Ring o'Rosies
Oh I hate runny noses
A tissue! A tissue!
No don’t wipe it on your sleeve!
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 141
Curly Locks! Curly locks! Wilt thou be mine?
You’ll have to wash the dishes coz I’m a lazy swine
But I’ll lay you on a cushion and hold you in esteem
And I’ll make love too you until I make you scream
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 142
One misty, moisty, morning,
When rainy was the weather,
There I met a young man
All clothed in leather
All clothed in leather,
Fitted as tight as his skin
How do you wear it?
How do you move in it?
And what is that squeaking?
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 143
Robin Hood, Robin Hood,
Living in the green wood
With his merry band
And their stolen contraband
They feast and they dine
On stolen food and wine
Then the laughing starts
When Little John farts
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 144
Robin Hood, Robin Hood,
Living in the green wood
With his merry band
And their stolen contraband
Maid Marion comes no more
To the camp of the out laws
Since she saw the merry band
Skipping around holding hands
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 145
See a pin, pick it up,
And all day long you'll have good luck.
See a pin, pick it up,
And all day long you'll have a pin
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 146
See a pin, pick it up
Then you're sure to have good luck,
See a pin, prick yourself
And end up with hepatitis
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 147
See a pin, pick it up,
And all day long you'll have good luck.
See a pin let it lay,
And you wont be lumbered with a pin all day
Mary had a little drink
And got pissed as a cricket
She was found in the woods
Showing the boys her thicket
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 122
Mary loved her little lamb
Every single day of course
But most of all on Sunday
With homemade mint sauce
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 123
When I was a bachelor I lived by myself,
but people told me not to get left on the shelf
So I made up my mind and got me a wife
Too late I realised I had surrendered my life
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 124
Cock a doodle doo,
My wife has lost her shoe;
oh what a convenient confidence trick
Just so she can buy some new
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 125
Little Bobby Snooks was fond of his books,
And loved by his mother and father;
But the kind of books, read by Bobby Snooks,
were pornographic in nature
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 126
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
He must be a Liberal Democrat
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 127
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
But Humpty Dumpty couldn’t fall
Because he had to wear a safety harness
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 128
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
But so Humpty Dumpty wouldn’t fall
He was sent by the head of human resource
On a three week health and safety course
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 129
Ring-a-Ring o'Rosies
Something to wipe noses"
A-tishue? A-tishue?"
Or if not a hankie
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 130
Remember, remember the fifth of November
Gunpowder, treason and plot.
They had the right approach back then
Blow up the bloody lot
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 131
Oh, Pillykin, Willykin, Winky Wee!
How does the President take his tea?
He takes it with sugar, he takes it with milk,
He takes it in bed wearing pyjamas of silk
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 132
If all the seas were one sea,
What a great sea that would be!
But if all the seas were one sea,
There’d be nowhere for you and me
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 133
I love little pussy,
Now don’t get excited
It’s not that kind of rhyme
That I want to be recited
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 134
Come let's to bed, says Sleepy-head;
Wait a while, says Mo;
Take a blue pill and grab the KY
And we’ll tup before we go.
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 135
Corporal TimWas dressed so trim,
He thought them all afraid of him;
But sad to say,The very first day,
We had a fight,He died alright,
For lack of equipment, poor Corporal Tim
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 136
Christmas is coming, the geese are getting fat
I can’t wait till Christmas to eat some of that
Coz I’m on the Atkins diet and that’s a fact
I just hope that I don’t have a heart attack
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 138
Sing a song of Sixth Sense
Haley Joel Osment wonders why
He’s followed every where
By that Bruce Willis guy
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 137
Jack and Jill went up the hill
With there supply of bottled water
What is it with these bloody ramblers?
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 139
Polly put the kettle on,
Polly put the kettle on,
Polly put the kettle on,
We'll all have tea.
Sukey take it off again,
Sukey take it off again,
Sukey take it off again,
Stop pissing about Sukey
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 140
Ring-a-Ring o'Rosies
Oh I hate runny noses
A tissue! A tissue!
No don’t wipe it on your sleeve!
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 141
Curly Locks! Curly locks! Wilt thou be mine?
You’ll have to wash the dishes coz I’m a lazy swine
But I’ll lay you on a cushion and hold you in esteem
And I’ll make love too you until I make you scream
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 142
One misty, moisty, morning,
When rainy was the weather,
There I met a young man
All clothed in leather
All clothed in leather,
Fitted as tight as his skin
How do you wear it?
How do you move in it?
And what is that squeaking?
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 143
Robin Hood, Robin Hood,
Living in the green wood
With his merry band
And their stolen contraband
They feast and they dine
On stolen food and wine
Then the laughing starts
When Little John farts
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 144
Robin Hood, Robin Hood,
Living in the green wood
With his merry band
And their stolen contraband
Maid Marion comes no more
To the camp of the out laws
Since she saw the merry band
Skipping around holding hands
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 145
See a pin, pick it up,
And all day long you'll have good luck.
See a pin, pick it up,
And all day long you'll have a pin
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 146
See a pin, pick it up
Then you're sure to have good luck,
See a pin, prick yourself
And end up with hepatitis
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 147
See a pin, pick it up,
And all day long you'll have good luck.
See a pin let it lay,
And you wont be lumbered with a pin all day
Thursday, 8 April 2010
SAPPHO’S FIRST KISS
When first sweet Sappho
Kissed me, I was shocked
The secret of my sexuality
Was finally unlocked
Sex had always left me cold
With no heat or fire
Now with Sappho’s kiss
I felt the burning desire
This was the first time
I’d felt this way
It never occurred to me
That I might be gay
Her hands fondled me
Inside my open shirt
Then she kissed my breasts
And her hand was up my skirt
My head was swimming
As my nipples felt her lips
Then she pulled my pants down
Over my trembling hips
While she sucked my nipples
And kissed my breasts
I felt the ecstasy
Of Sappho’s pudendal caress
Kissed me, I was shocked
The secret of my sexuality
Was finally unlocked
Sex had always left me cold
With no heat or fire
Now with Sappho’s kiss
I felt the burning desire
This was the first time
I’d felt this way
It never occurred to me
That I might be gay
Her hands fondled me
Inside my open shirt
Then she kissed my breasts
And her hand was up my skirt
My head was swimming
As my nipples felt her lips
Then she pulled my pants down
Over my trembling hips
While she sucked my nipples
And kissed my breasts
I felt the ecstasy
Of Sappho’s pudendal caress
SUNDAY SERVICE
Her dark eyes, sultry and steamy
Flashed a sideward’s glance
From beneath the black lace of her Mantilla
He gave her a browse
A more appraising look altogether
Her eyes flashed up again
A lingering languid glance
Which spoke of her muliebrity
Not the putative girl
They were now the cynosure
Of each others eyes
No words were spoken
Everything was intuit
With amative study
And libidinous perusal
She his object of pulchritude
He her beloved inamorato
Then they had to separate
And the spell was broken
Until next Sundays reunion
Flashed a sideward’s glance
From beneath the black lace of her Mantilla
He gave her a browse
A more appraising look altogether
Her eyes flashed up again
A lingering languid glance
Which spoke of her muliebrity
Not the putative girl
They were now the cynosure
Of each others eyes
No words were spoken
Everything was intuit
With amative study
And libidinous perusal
She his object of pulchritude
He her beloved inamorato
Then they had to separate
And the spell was broken
Until next Sundays reunion
WHERE WAS GOD?
When Haiti shook
And the old colonial
Structures fell
Who was to blame?
When the rains fell on Madeira
Making rivers of mud
Where once were roads
Who was to blame?
When earthquake and tsunami
Wreaked their havoc
On Chile’s coast
Who was to blame?
The zealots speak of God’s wrath,
Divine retribution
Against the wicked of the world
Smiting the transgressors
But it’s not the wicked who suffer
It’s the most humble and devout
The poor and the needy
Who suffer the most
Why would God do such a thing?
What would be gained?
It’s not a Godly act
But rather that of a tyrant
That’s not what my God would do
My God is a loving God
Not a wrathful being
The secular blame God
For not stopping natural disasters
They don’t believe in him
But blame him anyway
Where was God?
What was God doing when he was needed?
When something wonderful happens
They praise nature’s ingenuity
Yet when tragedy strikes
It’s “where was God?”
God is not to blame
It is not within his power to prevent disasters
So he does what he can
He comforts and supports
Eases suffering and ends pain
But my God is not to blame
Mother Nature is the culprit
The planet is angry with mankind
And unleashes these acts of spite
To punish us for our indifference
Mother Nature roars
And defines our insignificance
When the earth moves
And mountains split
When winds tear up all before them
And the seas rise up
We are powerless
But we are not alone
When we are at our most vulnerable
Who do we call upon? God
Whoever that God might be
Mine is an understanding God
A compassionate God
And the old colonial
Structures fell
Who was to blame?
When the rains fell on Madeira
Making rivers of mud
Where once were roads
Who was to blame?
When earthquake and tsunami
Wreaked their havoc
On Chile’s coast
Who was to blame?
The zealots speak of God’s wrath,
Divine retribution
Against the wicked of the world
Smiting the transgressors
But it’s not the wicked who suffer
It’s the most humble and devout
The poor and the needy
Who suffer the most
Why would God do such a thing?
What would be gained?
It’s not a Godly act
But rather that of a tyrant
That’s not what my God would do
My God is a loving God
Not a wrathful being
The secular blame God
For not stopping natural disasters
They don’t believe in him
But blame him anyway
Where was God?
What was God doing when he was needed?
When something wonderful happens
They praise nature’s ingenuity
Yet when tragedy strikes
It’s “where was God?”
God is not to blame
It is not within his power to prevent disasters
So he does what he can
He comforts and supports
Eases suffering and ends pain
But my God is not to blame
Mother Nature is the culprit
The planet is angry with mankind
And unleashes these acts of spite
To punish us for our indifference
Mother Nature roars
And defines our insignificance
When the earth moves
And mountains split
When winds tear up all before them
And the seas rise up
We are powerless
But we are not alone
When we are at our most vulnerable
Who do we call upon? God
Whoever that God might be
Mine is an understanding God
A compassionate God
LENT
LENT
This time of year is significant
For what Lent represents
But I have racked my brains
And don’t know what to give up for lent
I really don’t know what to give up
I don’t have a sweet tooth
And I neither smoke nor drink
No vices at all and that’s the truth
So despite its significance
For what Lent represents
I have come to the conclusion
It’s easier just to give up lent
I HAVE GIVEN UP FOR LENT
I have given up for lent
Pate de fois gras
Lobster thermadore
And Beluga caviar
Well in a way
I’ve never had them ever
But I won’t have them
Between now and Easter
WHAT CAN I GIVE UP?
For lent you have to give up
Something that you enjoy
Well that gave me a lot more choices
When I was but a boy
Now it’s not quite so easy
I don’t enjoy too much at my age
So I will have to give up being cantankerous
Or just give up road rage
This time of year is significant
For what Lent represents
But I have racked my brains
And don’t know what to give up for lent
I really don’t know what to give up
I don’t have a sweet tooth
And I neither smoke nor drink
No vices at all and that’s the truth
So despite its significance
For what Lent represents
I have come to the conclusion
It’s easier just to give up lent
I HAVE GIVEN UP FOR LENT
I have given up for lent
Pate de fois gras
Lobster thermadore
And Beluga caviar
Well in a way
I’ve never had them ever
But I won’t have them
Between now and Easter
WHAT CAN I GIVE UP?
For lent you have to give up
Something that you enjoy
Well that gave me a lot more choices
When I was but a boy
Now it’s not quite so easy
I don’t enjoy too much at my age
So I will have to give up being cantankerous
Or just give up road rage
MANDELA
What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it that he opposed apartheid?
So what?
He wasn’t alone in that
That doesn’t make him great
That would make half the world great
What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it that he led the ANC’s military wing?
So what?
Not really the stuff of greatness
Just another bloody terrorist
What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it his twenty seven years in jail?
So what?
Murder and rape will achieve that
That doesn’t make him great
What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it that he symbolized the struggle?
A beacon against apartheid
So what?
That doesn’t make him great
What makes Mandela a great man?
Is it that he’s a nice silver haired old man?
With a warm affable smile
So what?
That could be my granddad
What makes him a great man?
Was it that he was the first black president?
Of a free South Africa
Very historic
But that alone doesn’t make him great
What makes Mandela a great man
Is his humility
His humanity
He could have spoken in vengeance
Yet he spoke of reconciliation
He could have evened the score
Balanced the books
For black South Africa
He could have unleashed
A black tide of death and destruction
Upon the white minority
Pay back
But he did not
Instead he spoke forgiveness
He could have been a Mugabe
And never relinquished power
But chose to serve only one term
Then handed on the baton
His work was done
His greatness set in stone
Was it that he opposed apartheid?
So what?
He wasn’t alone in that
That doesn’t make him great
That would make half the world great
What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it that he led the ANC’s military wing?
So what?
Not really the stuff of greatness
Just another bloody terrorist
What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it his twenty seven years in jail?
So what?
Murder and rape will achieve that
That doesn’t make him great
What makes Mandela a great man?
Was it that he symbolized the struggle?
A beacon against apartheid
So what?
That doesn’t make him great
What makes Mandela a great man?
Is it that he’s a nice silver haired old man?
With a warm affable smile
So what?
That could be my granddad
What makes him a great man?
Was it that he was the first black president?
Of a free South Africa
Very historic
But that alone doesn’t make him great
What makes Mandela a great man
Is his humility
His humanity
He could have spoken in vengeance
Yet he spoke of reconciliation
He could have evened the score
Balanced the books
For black South Africa
He could have unleashed
A black tide of death and destruction
Upon the white minority
Pay back
But he did not
Instead he spoke forgiveness
He could have been a Mugabe
And never relinquished power
But chose to serve only one term
Then handed on the baton
His work was done
His greatness set in stone
THE WONDERFUL GIRL I SEE
Why do I love you?
Well it could be
Because you’re beautiful
Or that you’re funny
It could perhaps be
That you laugh at my jokes
Or that you chose me
When there are better blokes
It might be because
You’re caring and sharing
Or of modest disposition
Though cautiously daring
Why do I love you?
It could quite easily be
Your wisdom and intelligence
Or that you’re pretty and witty
But it doesn’t matter
What superlatives I apply
Or how long the list of traits
And attributes that I supply
You wouldn’t recognize them
The wonderful girl I see
Would be a stranger to you
Such is your modesty
Well it could be
Because you’re beautiful
Or that you’re funny
It could perhaps be
That you laugh at my jokes
Or that you chose me
When there are better blokes
It might be because
You’re caring and sharing
Or of modest disposition
Though cautiously daring
Why do I love you?
It could quite easily be
Your wisdom and intelligence
Or that you’re pretty and witty
But it doesn’t matter
What superlatives I apply
Or how long the list of traits
And attributes that I supply
You wouldn’t recognize them
The wonderful girl I see
Would be a stranger to you
Such is your modesty
WHY DO THEY CALL YOU PRUDISH JUDITH?
Hey Jude
I thought you were a prude
Hey Judith
I heard them call you prudish
Are you shy?
Is that the real reason why?
Hey Judith
Is that why they call you prudish?
But damn
When you’ve had a babycham
Wow Jude
You are no goody two shoes
In fact Jude
You are really rather crude
No prude
That I am forced to conclude
Jude I think
That is why you have a drink
As a cure
From being modest and demure
And Jude
When you’re in the mood
To be lewd
You are exceptionally rude
With no prudity
In the manner of your nudity
So Jude
I am forced to conclude
That Judith
Your prudishness is a myth
I thought you were a prude
Hey Judith
I heard them call you prudish
Are you shy?
Is that the real reason why?
Hey Judith
Is that why they call you prudish?
But damn
When you’ve had a babycham
Wow Jude
You are no goody two shoes
In fact Jude
You are really rather crude
No prude
That I am forced to conclude
Jude I think
That is why you have a drink
As a cure
From being modest and demure
And Jude
When you’re in the mood
To be lewd
You are exceptionally rude
With no prudity
In the manner of your nudity
So Jude
I am forced to conclude
That Judith
Your prudishness is a myth
HOME SPUN PHILOSOPHY
# 1
A positive attitude
May not solve all the problems you’ll face
Which can make your life a trial
But a positive attitude
Will annoy enough people along the way
To more than make it worth your while
# 2
We make a living by what we get
That’s one way to live
But the alternative is we make a lifeBy what we give
A positive attitude
May not solve all the problems you’ll face
Which can make your life a trial
But a positive attitude
Will annoy enough people along the way
To more than make it worth your while
# 2
We make a living by what we get
That’s one way to live
But the alternative is we make a lifeBy what we give
HOME SPUN PHILOSOPHY
# 1
A positive attitude
May not solve all the problems you’ll face
Which can make your life a trial
But a positive attitude
Will annoy enough people along the way
To more than make it worth your while
# 2
We make a living by what we get
That’s one way to live
But the alternative is we make a lifeBy what we give
A positive attitude
May not solve all the problems you’ll face
Which can make your life a trial
But a positive attitude
Will annoy enough people along the way
To more than make it worth your while
# 2
We make a living by what we get
That’s one way to live
But the alternative is we make a lifeBy what we give
FAITH IS LIKE
# 1
Faith is like electricity
You can’t see its traits
But you can see the light
That it generates
# 2
Faith is like electricity
You can’t see it
But you can see the light
That emanates from it
Faith is like electricity
You can’t see its traits
But you can see the light
That it generates
# 2
Faith is like electricity
You can’t see it
But you can see the light
That emanates from it
NEVER JUDGE A BOOK
There is much more to a woman
Than what she can put on show
There is more in the emporium
Than there is in the shop window
Like an expensive Champagne
That a Lambrusco will out fizzle
A woman displaying all her assets
Is invariably all sausage and no sizzle
It’s the homely types that most excite
Hiding their figure neath frumpy dress
Shy and modest to the outside world
It’s the quiet ones who most impress
Beneath sober dress they burn hottest
Much hotter than the most brazen vamp
And when you get them alone they turn
From prim librarian into wanton tramp
Than what she can put on show
There is more in the emporium
Than there is in the shop window
Like an expensive Champagne
That a Lambrusco will out fizzle
A woman displaying all her assets
Is invariably all sausage and no sizzle
It’s the homely types that most excite
Hiding their figure neath frumpy dress
Shy and modest to the outside world
It’s the quiet ones who most impress
Beneath sober dress they burn hottest
Much hotter than the most brazen vamp
And when you get them alone they turn
From prim librarian into wanton tramp
NOT FADE AWAY
Big man
Strong man
Barrel chested
Smiling faced
Hearty man
Where have you gone?
I watched you get into that bed
A few short weeks ago
But you have disappeared
And I don’t know when you went
Your laughter was first to go
That fruity chuckle
That warmed and cheered
Fell silent first
Then your conversation
Once a source of knowledge
Wisdom and sardonic wit
Dried up like a drought stricken lake
Your sentences grew shorter
Disjointed and inarticulate
Until they were no more
Then you began to fade
Like a picture going out of focus
When you opened your eyes
And I looked in them
I saw no one looking back
The spark had gone
You had gone
When had you gone?
We didn’t say goodbye
As I looked at the withering shell
In its unconscious state
I heard the groans, as the pain cut deep
Through the morphine
In the slow agonizing transition
From man to corpse
I cannot pick the moment
At which you were no more
But it was days before rather than hours
When the essential you left
When that which made you, you, was no more
I hoped you were not in there
Suffering
Dying by inches
God I hoped not
What savages we are
To inflict this end on a human being
We would not do it to our favourite pet
We would not treat a dog like this
Yet I let it happen to this man
What indignity
What inhumanity
What kind of son am I?
I will not go this way
I will not fade away
I will not vanish
Before my loved ones eyes
I will say my goodbyes
I will smile before I go
I will go on my termsI will go by my own hand
Strong man
Barrel chested
Smiling faced
Hearty man
Where have you gone?
I watched you get into that bed
A few short weeks ago
But you have disappeared
And I don’t know when you went
Your laughter was first to go
That fruity chuckle
That warmed and cheered
Fell silent first
Then your conversation
Once a source of knowledge
Wisdom and sardonic wit
Dried up like a drought stricken lake
Your sentences grew shorter
Disjointed and inarticulate
Until they were no more
Then you began to fade
Like a picture going out of focus
When you opened your eyes
And I looked in them
I saw no one looking back
The spark had gone
You had gone
When had you gone?
We didn’t say goodbye
As I looked at the withering shell
In its unconscious state
I heard the groans, as the pain cut deep
Through the morphine
In the slow agonizing transition
From man to corpse
I cannot pick the moment
At which you were no more
But it was days before rather than hours
When the essential you left
When that which made you, you, was no more
I hoped you were not in there
Suffering
Dying by inches
God I hoped not
What savages we are
To inflict this end on a human being
We would not do it to our favourite pet
We would not treat a dog like this
Yet I let it happen to this man
What indignity
What inhumanity
What kind of son am I?
I will not go this way
I will not fade away
I will not vanish
Before my loved ones eyes
I will say my goodbyes
I will smile before I go
I will go on my termsI will go by my own hand
Thursday, 4 March 2010
BOND
In an instant you were gone
Taken from us by another’s selfishness
He was too drunk too walk
So he drove instead
Devastation left in his wake
The children want to know why
I don’t have the answer
They look to me for a reason
They look to me for strength
They cling to me out of fear
The fear of losing me too
But they must be my reason
And they are my strength
And I cling to them out of fear
The fear of losing them too
Taken from us by another’s selfishness
He was too drunk too walk
So he drove instead
Devastation left in his wake
The children want to know why
I don’t have the answer
They look to me for a reason
They look to me for strength
They cling to me out of fear
The fear of losing me too
But they must be my reason
And they are my strength
And I cling to them out of fear
The fear of losing them too
LOVE ALONE
Love alone did light
Passions flame burning bright
Emotions slowly stir
For the want of her
Only she can quench the fire
Of this burning desire
Romance in all its glory
Has written this love story
Passions flame burning bright
Emotions slowly stir
For the want of her
Only she can quench the fire
Of this burning desire
Romance in all its glory
Has written this love story
LOVE FEVER
Love is not heralded
By lightning strike
Or thunders crash
Nor by Mantovanni’s Violins,
A chorus of heavenly voices
Or 21 gun salute
Love is more subtle
Love is stealthy
Love creeps up on you
When least expected
It seeps into open pores
Unnoticed and unheralded
Then spreads like a virus
Until you are defenseless
And you are hooked
And there is no cure
By lightning strike
Or thunders crash
Nor by Mantovanni’s Violins,
A chorus of heavenly voices
Or 21 gun salute
Love is more subtle
Love is stealthy
Love creeps up on you
When least expected
It seeps into open pores
Unnoticed and unheralded
Then spreads like a virus
Until you are defenseless
And you are hooked
And there is no cure
SCENT OF A WOMAN
An exotic fragrance filled the air
A heady perfume so divine
A scent that made me giddy
Like being intoxicated on wine
It was the girl with the dazzling smile
And almost luminous eyes
When she spoke each sentence
Was like a string of sultry sighs
Each sweet honey coated word
Delivered from her luscious lips
What import may have been
The honey sound did eclipse
I was mesmerised by her
For how long I could not say
But it is to my satisfaction
That she chose not go away
A heady perfume so divine
A scent that made me giddy
Like being intoxicated on wine
It was the girl with the dazzling smile
And almost luminous eyes
When she spoke each sentence
Was like a string of sultry sighs
Each sweet honey coated word
Delivered from her luscious lips
What import may have been
The honey sound did eclipse
I was mesmerised by her
For how long I could not say
But it is to my satisfaction
That she chose not go away
BLIND SIDED
Love confuses the senses
It tricks us into seeing what’s not there
We see what we want to see
Someone you love, who loves you back
In equal measure
Someone as happy, content, faithful
As you are
But love blinds us
It blinds us to the truth
It fails to register
All the tell tale signs
Of sadness, discontent and infidelity
Until it’s too late
It tricks us into seeing what’s not there
We see what we want to see
Someone you love, who loves you back
In equal measure
Someone as happy, content, faithful
As you are
But love blinds us
It blinds us to the truth
It fails to register
All the tell tale signs
Of sadness, discontent and infidelity
Until it’s too late
FILM CHOICE
How too choose, how to select
A film to fill that two hour slot
The bumph will big it up
Over egg the pudding like as not
So I look for key word like
“Thought provoking” or “moody”
“Poignant, “Critically acclaimed”
Or “Stunning cinematography”
And when I’ve identified them
I know they are the ones to miss
And I get the one with the cover picture
Of a girl in a state of undress
A film to fill that two hour slot
The bumph will big it up
Over egg the pudding like as not
So I look for key word like
“Thought provoking” or “moody”
“Poignant, “Critically acclaimed”
Or “Stunning cinematography”
And when I’ve identified them
I know they are the ones to miss
And I get the one with the cover picture
Of a girl in a state of undress
THERE IS A GHOST IN MY HOUSE
There is a ghost in my house
That haunts my every waking moment
And infiltrates my dreams
A ghost that taunts and torments
The ghost in my house is you
I am haunted by the memory of you
It is the ghost of our lost love
And I am tormented because I let you go
That haunts my every waking moment
And infiltrates my dreams
A ghost that taunts and torments
The ghost in my house is you
I am haunted by the memory of you
It is the ghost of our lost love
And I am tormented because I let you go
USED AND ABUSED
You sought me out
And overwhelmed me
Your directness was disarming
You were seductive and charming
But the want of you made me ache
And soon you took me to bed
Made me sweat and made me shake
As you soothed my ache
You made me whimper and moan
And grunt and groan
You used me and abused me
Until I begged for rest
You exhausted me
Till I could scarcely go on
And when I had no more to give
You wrung me out like a wet rag
And cast me aside
Then as quickly as you came into my life
You were gone from it
And I slept the clock around
And overwhelmed me
Your directness was disarming
You were seductive and charming
But the want of you made me ache
And soon you took me to bed
Made me sweat and made me shake
As you soothed my ache
You made me whimper and moan
And grunt and groan
You used me and abused me
Until I begged for rest
You exhausted me
Till I could scarcely go on
And when I had no more to give
You wrung me out like a wet rag
And cast me aside
Then as quickly as you came into my life
You were gone from it
And I slept the clock around
NATURAL WORLD
They say nature is perfect
They say nature is beautiful
But they are so wrong
Nature is ugly and brutal
Oh it looks pretty in a picture
I quite accept it all looks nice
But don’t be fooled
Nature will kill you in a trice
It doesn’t matter where you go
If you look closely enough
Something is eating something else
Nature is cruel and tough
Its dog eat dog its bird eat frog
Its fish eat fish its whale eat seal
In nature it seems to me
Everything is some body’s meal
So don’t try telling to me
That nature is perfect and wonderful
I don’t need the natural world
I can go to London if I want brutal
They say nature is beautiful
But they are so wrong
Nature is ugly and brutal
Oh it looks pretty in a picture
I quite accept it all looks nice
But don’t be fooled
Nature will kill you in a trice
It doesn’t matter where you go
If you look closely enough
Something is eating something else
Nature is cruel and tough
Its dog eat dog its bird eat frog
Its fish eat fish its whale eat seal
In nature it seems to me
Everything is some body’s meal
So don’t try telling to me
That nature is perfect and wonderful
I don’t need the natural world
I can go to London if I want brutal
MOUSE TALE
We have an unwanted mouse in our house
But am I permitted to kill it? No is the answer
My son suggested I leave the back door open
So it could let it self out when it was ready
My wife wants me to buy a humane trap
So I can catch it, release it, and catch it again next week
How confused we are of what animals are
We have this romantic notion of the animal kingdom
That they are just like humans but in animal form
We have endowed the beasts with human qualities
Beatrix Potter’s tales are a classic example of this
Stories spoon fed to young eager minds for decades
Mice do not live in houses, watch TV or play scrabble
It’s just a mouse, its vermin, and it’s eating my food
They have been humanised in a century of cartoons
In that undignified way we have Disney-fied them
Well we need to un-Disneyfy the creatures double quick
So I have baited my trap and I will wait for the snap
Because Mice don’t live in houses especially not in mine
But am I permitted to kill it? No is the answer
My son suggested I leave the back door open
So it could let it self out when it was ready
My wife wants me to buy a humane trap
So I can catch it, release it, and catch it again next week
How confused we are of what animals are
We have this romantic notion of the animal kingdom
That they are just like humans but in animal form
We have endowed the beasts with human qualities
Beatrix Potter’s tales are a classic example of this
Stories spoon fed to young eager minds for decades
Mice do not live in houses, watch TV or play scrabble
It’s just a mouse, its vermin, and it’s eating my food
They have been humanised in a century of cartoons
In that undignified way we have Disney-fied them
Well we need to un-Disneyfy the creatures double quick
So I have baited my trap and I will wait for the snap
Because Mice don’t live in houses especially not in mine
PLANNING FOR THE FUTURE
I have three teenage sons
With appetites like men
And it costs a fortune
Feeding all of them
But due to the economy
Times are hard you see
So as they eat like men
At dinner time I told them
“Due to the current recession
Which may lead to a depression
Tough times are ahead you know
So we will have to let you all go"
With appetites like men
And it costs a fortune
Feeding all of them
But due to the economy
Times are hard you see
So as they eat like men
At dinner time I told them
“Due to the current recession
Which may lead to a depression
Tough times are ahead you know
So we will have to let you all go"
IT’S NOT OVER
We left the stadium after awhile
Exiting though the open turnstiles
To find inappropriately clad in licra
And standing on top of a Micra
A very fat woman singing opera
From on top of that poor little car
When I heard a laugh from my lad
Who then said “It’s all over then Dad”
Exiting though the open turnstiles
To find inappropriately clad in licra
And standing on top of a Micra
A very fat woman singing opera
From on top of that poor little car
When I heard a laugh from my lad
Who then said “It’s all over then Dad”
LOVE COMES IN MANY SHADES
Love comes in many shades
Ranged as on a colour chart
From “like” to “can’t live without”
Some love knows only sunlight
Others inhabit the dark places
Some are shallow and superficial
Others deep and intensive
Love can simply be physical
Or a mere infatuation
It can be companionable, platonic
Or purely spiritual
Love is both simple and complex.
Often at the same time
It can be of the moment
Or woven through the fabric of your life
It can be merely a veneer
Or layered in strata
But the simple truth is that love
Is the glue that holds the universe together
Ranged as on a colour chart
From “like” to “can’t live without”
Some love knows only sunlight
Others inhabit the dark places
Some are shallow and superficial
Others deep and intensive
Love can simply be physical
Or a mere infatuation
It can be companionable, platonic
Or purely spiritual
Love is both simple and complex.
Often at the same time
It can be of the moment
Or woven through the fabric of your life
It can be merely a veneer
Or layered in strata
But the simple truth is that love
Is the glue that holds the universe together
AS IF I WASN’T THERE
A green eyed goddess
Pretty as a picture
With ringlets of flaming red
Cascading on to her ivory skin
Her peaches and cream complexion
Fresh as an English rose
With skin pale as porcelain
Yet passion blooms upon her cheek
Aglow with an apples blush
And as she approaches
A cloud enveloped me
Like exotically fragranced orchids
Leaving me heady and breathless
Then she just passed me by
As if I wasn’t there
Leaving me wretched in her wake
Pretty as a picture
With ringlets of flaming red
Cascading on to her ivory skin
Her peaches and cream complexion
Fresh as an English rose
With skin pale as porcelain
Yet passion blooms upon her cheek
Aglow with an apples blush
And as she approaches
A cloud enveloped me
Like exotically fragranced orchids
Leaving me heady and breathless
Then she just passed me by
As if I wasn’t there
Leaving me wretched in her wake
TO PROTECT AND SERVE
A police officer was shot
Bravely in the line of duty
And he lay bleeding in the street
From a shot gun injury
There was a lot of blood
But the wound was traced
By the attending medic
To a site below the waist
He was rushed to hospital
Where they fought for his life
And after weeks of special care
He was released to the care of his wife
Because he took the bullet
Bravely in the line of duty
The police Department decided
Despite the extent of the injury
He should not face medical retirement
His wife felt this was undeserved
As he was still able to protect
But he could no longer serve
Bravely in the line of duty
And he lay bleeding in the street
From a shot gun injury
There was a lot of blood
But the wound was traced
By the attending medic
To a site below the waist
He was rushed to hospital
Where they fought for his life
And after weeks of special care
He was released to the care of his wife
Because he took the bullet
Bravely in the line of duty
The police Department decided
Despite the extent of the injury
He should not face medical retirement
His wife felt this was undeserved
As he was still able to protect
But he could no longer serve
THE CHARACTER OF GOLF
The game of Golf is character building
In the view of certain people
Others are a little more grounded
And would describe it as a perpetual
Series of unmitigated disasters
Punctuated by an occasional miracle
In the view of certain people
Others are a little more grounded
And would describe it as a perpetual
Series of unmitigated disasters
Punctuated by an occasional miracle
THE LEGEND OF THE SILENT POOL
The amorous King John
Took by ungentlemanly force
The woodcutter’s daughter
And put her upon his horse
He took her from Albury village
To a place called the silent pool
The girl scared and crying
Prayed the Kings ardour had cooled
He pressed his intent upon her
So into the dark lake she fled
From his horse he drove her ever deeper
Until the poor girl was dead
Now on the silent pool at midnight
The maiden can be seen there
Where the amorous King John
Did drown the life from her
Took by ungentlemanly force
The woodcutter’s daughter
And put her upon his horse
He took her from Albury village
To a place called the silent pool
The girl scared and crying
Prayed the Kings ardour had cooled
He pressed his intent upon her
So into the dark lake she fled
From his horse he drove her ever deeper
Until the poor girl was dead
Now on the silent pool at midnight
The maiden can be seen there
Where the amorous King John
Did drown the life from her
DECEMBER SKY
Under the rich December sky
Breath plumed in the frost filled air
The winter sky sparkled with stars
Like diamonds stitched to the curtain of night
The moon was almost full
And from that December moon
The lunar light bathed the landscape
So that light sparkled on the ice crystals
Creating a myriad of twinkling stars
To mimic their celestial cousins
Breath plumed in the frost filled air
The winter sky sparkled with stars
Like diamonds stitched to the curtain of night
The moon was almost full
And from that December moon
The lunar light bathed the landscape
So that light sparkled on the ice crystals
Creating a myriad of twinkling stars
To mimic their celestial cousins
Thursday, 25 February 2010
SOUL MATES UNITED
Since the first day
When my life was blessed
When by Gods grace
You entered my world
We shared one love
One heart
One soul
Soul mates united
And life was good to us
So good we didn’t notice
The years quickly slip by
Then you slipped by with them
And I was alone
Half a love
Half a heart
Half a soul
Incomplete
And I could have blamed God
For taking you away
But I thank him instead
For the life we shared
Though I mourn your passing
And yearn for you
I know in my heart
We will be together again
When my life was blessed
When by Gods grace
You entered my world
We shared one love
One heart
One soul
Soul mates united
And life was good to us
So good we didn’t notice
The years quickly slip by
Then you slipped by with them
And I was alone
Half a love
Half a heart
Half a soul
Incomplete
And I could have blamed God
For taking you away
But I thank him instead
For the life we shared
Though I mourn your passing
And yearn for you
I know in my heart
We will be together again
NEWLANDS CORNER
Newlands Corner
Is one of my most favourite places
I’ve always loved it there
When I look out across the patchwork
Of rolling Surrey Hills,
The chalk grasslands
The ancient woodlands
And the villages nestling there
I feel a deep calm and peace
Penetrating my soul
It’s almost overwhelming
Like the weight of the world
Is lifted from my shoulders
It as if His hand on my shoulder
Is one of my most favourite places
I’ve always loved it there
When I look out across the patchwork
Of rolling Surrey Hills,
The chalk grasslands
The ancient woodlands
And the villages nestling there
I feel a deep calm and peace
Penetrating my soul
It’s almost overwhelming
Like the weight of the world
Is lifted from my shoulders
It as if His hand on my shoulder
A Little Philosophy
SHAMELESS
There appears to be no shame
In our modern society
This is true for all walks of life
But in particular celebrities
Because what was once shame
Is now just called publicity
LASTING IMPRESSIONS
Those with personality
Find it can open doors for them
But what they need is character
To keep the doors open
DON’T CRY
Don’t cry because the love affair is over
Wipe those tears from your face
And allow yourself to smile because
It happened in the first place
IF AT FIRST YOU DON’T SUCCEED
If at first you don’t succeed
Don’t let it cause you distress
And if you still fail to succeed
You must redefine success
HAM AND EGGS
Good morning whats for breakfast?
Can I have eggs and ham please?
That’s a nice simple breakfast
That can be prepared with ease
Well not as simple as you may think
Oh its but a days work for the hen
But for the poor old pig
It’s a lifetime of commitment
NEVER A BORROWER NOR A LENDER BE
Never a borrower nor a lender be
That is my simple philosophy
But if the need you can’t resist
Borrow money from a pessimist
A positive attitude they sadly lack
So they don’t really expect it back
GETTING ON IN YOUR CAREER
After many years I am forced to conclude
It will almost certainly be your attitude
In the work place and not your aptitude
That will determine your ultimate altitude
There appears to be no shame
In our modern society
This is true for all walks of life
But in particular celebrities
Because what was once shame
Is now just called publicity
LASTING IMPRESSIONS
Those with personality
Find it can open doors for them
But what they need is character
To keep the doors open
DON’T CRY
Don’t cry because the love affair is over
Wipe those tears from your face
And allow yourself to smile because
It happened in the first place
IF AT FIRST YOU DON’T SUCCEED
If at first you don’t succeed
Don’t let it cause you distress
And if you still fail to succeed
You must redefine success
HAM AND EGGS
Good morning whats for breakfast?
Can I have eggs and ham please?
That’s a nice simple breakfast
That can be prepared with ease
Well not as simple as you may think
Oh its but a days work for the hen
But for the poor old pig
It’s a lifetime of commitment
NEVER A BORROWER NOR A LENDER BE
Never a borrower nor a lender be
That is my simple philosophy
But if the need you can’t resist
Borrow money from a pessimist
A positive attitude they sadly lack
So they don’t really expect it back
GETTING ON IN YOUR CAREER
After many years I am forced to conclude
It will almost certainly be your attitude
In the work place and not your aptitude
That will determine your ultimate altitude
A Little Humour
THE MIRACLE OF FLIGHT
It has been said that the miracle of aviation
Is that the aeroplane is nothing more in interpretation
Than 50000 components flying in close formation
And hopefully all bound for the same destination
THE CANDY MAN
He has had a very sweet tooth all of his life
He even found himself a rather sweet wife
He’d eat cream cakes and all kinds of sweeties
Now he has high cholesterol and type 2 diabetes
CAR SCRAP-AGE
I’m very disappointed with the government
And their much heralded car scrap-age scheme
I took my “old banger” along with me to the garage
But my wife wasn’t what they had in mind it seems
BOILER REPLACEMENT SCHEME
I’m very disappointed with the government
And their gas boiler replacement scheme
I called the Gas Company about my “old boiler”
But my wife wasn’t what they had in mind it seems
AGEING POPULATION
In the future, maybe forty years or so
The nursing homes will just overflow
With sweet little silver haired old biddies
Doting on their numerous little grand kiddies
As they sit peering thru bifocal glasses
With faded tattoos on their wrinkled arses
THE BEAR STARE
I have a photograph
Of a magnificent Polar Bear
It was taken at one of those sea life places
The polar bear is underwater
Looking through the glass
At an inquisitive little boy
Whose face was pressed up against the glass
And you can see in the Polar Bears
Intelligent soulful eyes
As it looks at the inquisitive little boy
That he is thinking to himself
“If I could just get through this glass
I would eat you as a snack”
It has been said that the miracle of aviation
Is that the aeroplane is nothing more in interpretation
Than 50000 components flying in close formation
And hopefully all bound for the same destination
THE CANDY MAN
He has had a very sweet tooth all of his life
He even found himself a rather sweet wife
He’d eat cream cakes and all kinds of sweeties
Now he has high cholesterol and type 2 diabetes
CAR SCRAP-AGE
I’m very disappointed with the government
And their much heralded car scrap-age scheme
I took my “old banger” along with me to the garage
But my wife wasn’t what they had in mind it seems
BOILER REPLACEMENT SCHEME
I’m very disappointed with the government
And their gas boiler replacement scheme
I called the Gas Company about my “old boiler”
But my wife wasn’t what they had in mind it seems
AGEING POPULATION
In the future, maybe forty years or so
The nursing homes will just overflow
With sweet little silver haired old biddies
Doting on their numerous little grand kiddies
As they sit peering thru bifocal glasses
With faded tattoos on their wrinkled arses
THE BEAR STARE
I have a photograph
Of a magnificent Polar Bear
It was taken at one of those sea life places
The polar bear is underwater
Looking through the glass
At an inquisitive little boy
Whose face was pressed up against the glass
And you can see in the Polar Bears
Intelligent soulful eyes
As it looks at the inquisitive little boy
That he is thinking to himself
“If I could just get through this glass
I would eat you as a snack”
DYING OF THE LIGHT
On the table
The candle sputters
Flame flickers
Almost guttering
But does not die
At the table
A heart yearns
Tears form
As hope fades
She cries inside
At the table
A rhetorically thought
He’s not coming
How cruel
She dies inside
At home
Her heart aches
Her spirit breaks
She drains the glass
And she dies
The candle sputters
Flame flickers
Almost guttering
But does not die
At the table
A heart yearns
Tears form
As hope fades
She cries inside
At the table
A rhetorically thought
He’s not coming
How cruel
She dies inside
At home
Her heart aches
Her spirit breaks
She drains the glass
And she dies
IF I HAD NOT LET YOU GO
If I had not let you go
What would we be now?
The perfect couple?
Mr and Mrs Right?
Or sad reflections of ourselves
If I had not seen
That we were not right together
We would now be
Bitter and resentful
Fighting like old dogs
Scratching at each others wounds
Love made us blind
Your love for me was deeper
And so you were blinder
So it hurt you more
When I let you go
I was right to let you go
I didn’t want to hurt you
Though I know I did
But I would have hurt you more
And I would not have regretted it
If I had stayed
If I had not let you go
I would have broken you
Broken your spirit
As well as your heart
You would not now know
Loves true face
So I can tolerate your hate
To know you are truly happy
What would we be now?
The perfect couple?
Mr and Mrs Right?
Or sad reflections of ourselves
If I had not seen
That we were not right together
We would now be
Bitter and resentful
Fighting like old dogs
Scratching at each others wounds
Love made us blind
Your love for me was deeper
And so you were blinder
So it hurt you more
When I let you go
I was right to let you go
I didn’t want to hurt you
Though I know I did
But I would have hurt you more
And I would not have regretted it
If I had stayed
If I had not let you go
I would have broken you
Broken your spirit
As well as your heart
You would not now know
Loves true face
So I can tolerate your hate
To know you are truly happy
Tuesday, 16 February 2010
LUST CONQUERS ALL
I love it when mouth meets mouth
And tongue engages tongue
Then the moment tender embrace
Gives way to urgent caress
When hands fumble their way
Into uncooperative clothing
In their wanton eagerness
To reach the yielding flesh beneath
Where fingers probe and hands grope
And passions flame ignites
I love to hear her rasp and gasp
And feel her nails dig into my flesh
To hear that stifled scream
And watch as she bites her lip
As climax carries her away
I love the feeling of closeness
As she lies in my arms
Basking in passions afterglow
Silent in our smug satisfaction
I feel her tender lips kiss my chest
And hear her contented sigh
I would like to know her name
But she is just another conquest
And tongue engages tongue
Then the moment tender embrace
Gives way to urgent caress
When hands fumble their way
Into uncooperative clothing
In their wanton eagerness
To reach the yielding flesh beneath
Where fingers probe and hands grope
And passions flame ignites
I love to hear her rasp and gasp
And feel her nails dig into my flesh
To hear that stifled scream
And watch as she bites her lip
As climax carries her away
I love the feeling of closeness
As she lies in my arms
Basking in passions afterglow
Silent in our smug satisfaction
I feel her tender lips kiss my chest
And hear her contented sigh
I would like to know her name
But she is just another conquest
WHO KILLED THE PINBALL WIZARD?
The Pinball wizard is dead
That deaf dumb and blind kid
Was shot dead by a stranger
It was such a senseless murder
That deaf dumb and blind kid
Was shot dead by a stranger
It was such a senseless murder
I WANT TO RIP THE HEART FROM MY CHEST
I want to rip the heart from my chest
So I won’t have to feel the pain
Of heart break ever again
I want to rip the heart from my chest
So I don’t have to feel it break
Then I can sit and watch it ache
I want to rip the heart from my chest
So love can no longer hurt me
And with no heart I will finally be free
So I won’t have to feel the pain
Of heart break ever again
I want to rip the heart from my chest
So I don’t have to feel it break
Then I can sit and watch it ache
I want to rip the heart from my chest
So love can no longer hurt me
And with no heart I will finally be free
LITERARY DOCTORATE
“Oh doctor, doctor
You must help me
I have been afflicted
Most horribly
I keep quoting
William Topaz McGonagall”
The doc replied
“We can’t help you at all”
“Oh doctor why
Cant you treat me for it”?
He replied
“Because this is the Burns unit”
You must help me
I have been afflicted
Most horribly
I keep quoting
William Topaz McGonagall”
The doc replied
“We can’t help you at all”
“Oh doctor why
Cant you treat me for it”?
He replied
“Because this is the Burns unit”
Friday, 12 February 2010
QUEEN OF HER DOMAIN
There she perches
Queen of her domain
Keen Eagle eyes scanning the scene
Head never still
Then in the water
A silvery glint
And she’s airborne
Gliding with silent grace
Almost aimlessly
Then with perfect timing
She strikes to take the rising fish
And with it safe in her talons
She sets off to deliver
The silver prize to her young
Queen of her domain
Keen Eagle eyes scanning the scene
Head never still
Then in the water
A silvery glint
And she’s airborne
Gliding with silent grace
Almost aimlessly
Then with perfect timing
She strikes to take the rising fish
And with it safe in her talons
She sets off to deliver
The silver prize to her young
LOVE IS A ROLLER COASTER
Being in love with you
Was like a roller coaster ride
Exhilarating and stomach churning
But not in a good way
Not in that happy waving your arms in the air
Screaming with delight kind of way
No not your roller coaster
Oh there was exhilaration
You took me to dizzy heights
When you really took my breath away
When I thought life didn’t get any better than that
Like walking through fields of flowers in the sunshine
Or hand in hand along an empty beach
Declarations of love and promises for the future
Making me feel I was the most special person in the world
Then without warning came the stomach churning
That headlong rush into darkness
Cast down into a trough of despair and bitterness
Jealousy and accusations
Venomous verbal tirades and volleys of flying fists
Churning my stomach and breaking my bones
Being in love with you
Was like the roller coaster ride from hell
So I got off and walked away
And I will never ride with you again
Your declarations of love and promises for the future
Are just empty words
Drowned out by your venomous tirades
Thinking of you may still churn my stomach
But you will break my bones no more
I got off your roller coaster broken and battered
But with my spirit in tact
Was like a roller coaster ride
Exhilarating and stomach churning
But not in a good way
Not in that happy waving your arms in the air
Screaming with delight kind of way
No not your roller coaster
Oh there was exhilaration
You took me to dizzy heights
When you really took my breath away
When I thought life didn’t get any better than that
Like walking through fields of flowers in the sunshine
Or hand in hand along an empty beach
Declarations of love and promises for the future
Making me feel I was the most special person in the world
Then without warning came the stomach churning
That headlong rush into darkness
Cast down into a trough of despair and bitterness
Jealousy and accusations
Venomous verbal tirades and volleys of flying fists
Churning my stomach and breaking my bones
Being in love with you
Was like the roller coaster ride from hell
So I got off and walked away
And I will never ride with you again
Your declarations of love and promises for the future
Are just empty words
Drowned out by your venomous tirades
Thinking of you may still churn my stomach
But you will break my bones no more
I got off your roller coaster broken and battered
But with my spirit in tact
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)