THE INLAND REVENUE KEEP WRITING TO ME

 

The Inland Revenue keep writing to me

Demanding that I pay or go to prison

But I don’t owe them a penny because

I now live by the seaside at Weston

DEATH AND TAXES

 

Death and taxes are the only certainties

In a life full of possibilities

Paying Taxes is an unpleasant act

Which I don’t enjoy and that’s a fact

But death is a different proposition

It’s not exactly an option

But I’m not afraid to go

But I fear the manner of it so

CRADLE TO THE GRAVE

 

I’m taxed on what I earn

By the government knave

I’m taxed on what I spend

I’m taxed on what I save

And every penny in between

I’m taxed from cradle to the grave

RIP OFF BRITAIN

 

What mugs we all are in the UK

With the amount of tax we have to pay

We’re taxed on what we earn at work

We’re taxed on every little perk

Then when we spend our pay

They take some purchase tax away

Very little is exempt from VAT

It’s even on a cup of tea

Even coffee and juices fruity

If you smoke you pay tobacco duty

Then the unkindest tax of all

Duty on every form of alcohol

If you can afford a new car today

There is an even greater price to pay

With seventeen and a half percent more owed

Then you’re taxed to keep it on the road

And you pay Tax on your fuel at the garage

Then in the city there’s the congestion charge

Then there’s a new tax to be faced

Parking the car at your workplace

You’re taxed for the policeman on the beat

And for the lighting in the street

Then Airport taxes for our holidays

We’re even taxed for what we throw away

If we buy or sell a house today

There’s not one tax but a whole array

We’re even taxed on the money we save

We’re taxed from the cradle to the grave

THE INLAND REVENUE KEEP WRITING TO ME

 

The Inland Revenue keep writing to me

Demanding that I pay or go to prison

But I don’t owe them a penny because

I now live by the seaside at Weston

RIP OFF BRITAIN

What mugs we all are in the UK
With the amount of tax we have to pay
We’re taxed on what we earn at work
We’re taxed on every little perk
Then when we spend our pay
They take some purchase tax away
Very little is exempt from VAT
It’s even on a cup of tea
Even coffee and juices fruity
If you smoke you pay tobacco duty
Then the unkindest tax of all
Duty on every form of alcohol
If you can afford a new car today
There is an even greater price to pay
With seventeen and a half percent more owed
Then you’re taxed to keep it on the road
And you pay Tax on your fuel at the garage
Then in the city there’s the congestion charge
Then there’s a new tax to be faced
Parking the car at your workplace
You’re taxed for the policeman on the beat
And for the lighting in the street
Then Airport taxes for our holidays
We’re even taxed for what we throw away
If we buy or sell a house today
There’s not one tax but a whole array
We’re even taxed on the money we save
We’re taxed from the cradle to the grave

CRADLE TO THE GRAVE

I’m taxed on what I earn
By the government knave
I’m taxed on what I spend
I’m taxed on what I save
And every penny in between
I’m taxed from cradle to the grave