Showing posts with label Science. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Science. Show all posts

Tuesday 20 June 2023

IT IS PERFECTLY CLEAR TO MOST OF US

 

It is perfectly clear to most of us

That atoms are the most conniving

Deceitful and untrustworthy

Because they make up everything

Saturday 10 June 2023

A NUMBER OF CHEMISTS WERE TAKEN ILL

 

A number of Chemists were taken ill

And try as we might we couldn’t Helium

And because we were unable to Curium

The only thing we could do was Barium

Sunday 28 May 2023

DID YOU HEAR OXYGEN

 

Did you hear oxygen

Is going out with magnesium

The first atom asked

OMg said the second atom

Thursday 11 May 2023

I’M GOOD AT CHEMISTRY AND I’M FUNNY # 2

 

I’m good at chemistry and I’m funny

Those are the talents, I rely upon

So when asked for a good Chemistry joke

I replied that all the good ones Argon

Wednesday 10 May 2023

I’M GOOD AT CHEMISTRY AND I’M FUNNY # 1

 

I’m good at chemistry and I’m funny

Those are my only talents, so far

So when I was asked if I knew

Any jokes about sodium, I replied Na

Sunday 19 March 2023

I HAVE COME TO THE CONCLUSION

 

I have come to the conclusion

That atoms are conniving

Deceitful and untrustworthy

Because they make up everything

Monday 13 March 2023

MY GREAT UNCLE IS A SCIENTIST

 

My Great Uncle is a scientist

As well as a keen horticulturist

Which is quite evident to see

As he’s growing a chemistree

Saturday 18 February 2023

A WORLD RENOWNED SCIENTIST

A world-renowned scientist

Decided that he would utilize

A beautiful knocker on his door

And he won the No Bell prize

Monday 13 February 2023

CHEMISTS AND ALCHEMISTS

 

Chemists and alchemists

Are both of feminine gender

Because one is an Ann Eliza

And the other a Charlotte Ann

Friday 10 February 2023

MY FATHER IN LAW IS A PHYSICIST

My father-in-law is a Physicist

Who is oblivious to culinary tips

He is too focussed on his work

So, he lives on Fission chips 

Wednesday 12 October 2022

SCIENTIST’S WERE EVER TO ACHIEVE SUCCESS

If scientists were ever to achieve success

In a cross breeding in which they would exult,

Between a rabbit’s foot and some poison ivy

Then a rash of good luck would be the result

Monday 10 October 2022

IF BOTANIST’S WERE TO ACHIEVE SUCCESS

 

If botanists were to achieve success

A cross germination in which to exult

Between poison ivy and a four-leaf clover

A rash of good luck would be the result

Thursday 30 June 2022

PUBLIC INFORMATION MESSAGE

 

This is a public information message

The information is for everyone

Kindly heed this important warning 

If you wish to heat or cook a bun

 

Using the microwave and the toaster

Simultaneously must not be done

It could throw the earth out of orbit

And send us crashing into the sun

Friday 17 June 2022

TRANSFUSION CONFUSION

Scientists have completed a study

And transfusions of Chicken blood

Are more beneficial medically

 

The positive side effects are that

It tends to make the men cocky

And women lay more regularly 

Friday 25 February 2022

PHYSICS QUESTIONS

 

Physicists pose important questions

Beneath the Swiss mountain slopes

With their large Hadron collider

And when for the answers they grope

Is the tool that measures their success

Going to be called a collider scope?

Wednesday 5 January 2022

IF SCIENTIST’S WERE EVER TO ACHIEVE SUCCESS

 

If scientists were ever to achieve success

In a cross breeding in which they would exult,

Between a rabbit’s foot and some poison ivy

Then a rash of good luck would be the result

Saturday 9 October 2021

ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE IS BEING EXPLORED

 

Artificial Intelligence is being explored

By science, despite its inadvisability

But then education and inquisitiveness

Are no defence against natural stupidity

Wednesday 29 September 2021

A NUMBER OF CHEMISTS WERE TAKEN ILL

 

A number of Chemists were taken ill

And try as we might we couldn’t Helium

And because we were unable to Curium

The only thing we could do was Barium

Tuesday 21 September 2021

DID YOU HEAR OXYGEN

 

Did you hear oxygen

Is going out with magnesium

The first atom asked

OMg said the second atom

Tuesday 14 September 2021

IT IS PERFECTLY CLEAR TO MOST OF US

 

It is perfectly clear to most of us

That atoms are the most conniving

Deceitful and untrustworthy

Because they make up everything